my grandfather passed away on tuesday, and ive been pretty upset about it the past few days. i was mad i was at school and not with my family etc. but nothing angers me more than the lack of communication in my family.
i finished classes today, but it was much to late to have taken the bus to get home, so i called a favor to a good friend to come get me at school so i could meet my sister at home and we could make the drive to new jersey to be with my family... but to be on my way home and find out that my dad and brother are home and my brother is going out. well that just makes me feel really stupid. i mean to have called my friend to come get me because i had no other way home says alot. especially considering he took the time to cancel his evening plans and make the the hour and fourty five minute ride to get me, but then to pull into my house and know that people are home probably sleeping on the couch or out. that just makes me feel really stupid. im just lucky i have good friends.
but then now im home and im sitting. if i was at school id be doing something right now. if i knew this was the plan i wouldnt have come home til early morning. it just kind of makes me angry that i ask again and again what i should do and what the plan is and i get 50 different answers from different people only to just be sitting on a couch watching some stupid fishing show.
i suppose i could do homework. but im so angry now its probably not possible.
not to mention all summer i wanted me & my mom to drive in my car to jersey, but she kept saying no because my car wouldnt be able to make the trip.. but when im not home and i show up and see that shes taken my car, .... well thats just a smack in the face... if you wanted to inadvertantly tell me you don't like driving with me you did an excellent job.
i hate being so upset with my family seeing as how awkward the next few days will be. but ive just been having a hard couple of months and im not one to show emotion to anyone but myself. so although i know everyone will be mad at me for not crying once in front of them. im quite alright with it.
Pop-Pop 9112007 forever in my heart
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I'm sorry about your grandfather. My family is kind of the same way with this type of stuff. One of my grandmothers was in the hospital for a week and then I found out....I would be the last person to ask how to resolve communication breakdowns in your family.
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